“Check your internal dialogue” 19 January 2025
AG.
Q. I am a 15 year- old girl preparing for my 10th standard board exams. The pressure to perform well in my exams is taking a toll on my mental well-being. I am feeling the exam pressure and often feel tired, struggle with sleep, and have lost interest in activities I once enjoyed. My parents keep saying that “you do your best, there is no pressure” but I feel they might be having certain expectations from me which I should fulfill. But I feel hesitant talking to them. Can you please guide me through this?
Ans. Examinations are generally a source of anxiety and hence stress for all people whether school or college students! The whole idea is to understand your self and your source of anxiety which can then be managed well. The sources are generally external and internal. External factors could be the subject matter- which are tough for you to understand and learn. The other factors could be pressure from parents, teachers, peers. Lack of preparation, ill health could be others and so on. The internal pressures are overly high expectations from self, more than your capacity, indiscipline, worries and negative thoughts and lack of confidence. Whatever time you have left, calm your mind, meditate, pray, study hard, recall and revise the lessons, practice as much as possible. Focus and concentrate only on studies and control all negative thoughts and emotions. You will certainly do well. Tell yourself repeatedly that ‘I will do well’. Do your best and leave the rest to destiny.
XYZ
Q. I am a marketing manager working in Mumbai. I have been working long hours to meet tight deadlines. The constant pressure and lack of work-life balance have led to burnout. I find myself feeling exhausted, unmotivated, and detached from my colleagues. I have begun to experience physical symptoms, such as headaches and fatigue. I want to include self-care in my routine, but am unable to. Please suggest some tips to deal with this.
Ans. Many times it is the thought process that leads to stress and not the work per se. Of -course there are deadlines to meet and pressures from the organization and needs of the family that all cry for attention. However, there is generally nothing like a perfect work-life balance. It is just a notion coined by some management gurus which does not exist for most people whether they are job doers or business people or entrepreneurs! All work is demanding and requires hard work to succeed. If you watch the shop owners/ traders who serve people from morning till night, we realize how hard people work to earn money. About attending to the needs of the family, it is a matter of priority and sometimes work takes priority over family and sometimes family takes more attention and that is the way it goes. Also, a negative attitude towards your work, in the sense, if you don’t like your work, you think it is a burden, its tough and boring it will lead to stress. However, if you accept it as a challenge, regard it as a necessary source of survival and income, find some meaning and purpose in it, it will not lead to stress. Please introspect and correct yourself. If you cannot do that effectively, consult a psychologist and take a few sessions.
