“Depression is a disease”- 31 May 2015.

R.B

Q. I am a science graduate, I’ve done graduation this year, and I do not understand what to do whether I should go for M.Sc or should I prepare for
competitive exams, like SSC or banking? Please advice.

Ans. If you are interested in seeking a job and no longer want to study further, you can start preparing for competitive examinations in the above sectors. In the banking sector an MBA is of much value in getting jobs and rising in the ladder. An M.Sc will help only if you want to pursue a career in the specific discipline in either research or teaching or in industry. First clear your career goals before you take a decision. The choice depends upon your aims and objectives.

A.T

Q. I’m preparing for JEE. I’m not good in my studies. I’m anxious because of my own expectations. I could not meet them. I’ve failed, whatever happened due to my overconfidence. I realised this and since then, I have been under confident. Everyone says that. Whenever I decide for a task, I’m scared to go for a challenge. I want to run out of it. In everything this happens. My companions are not good. I can say that probably, they don’t talk to me. Plus I got to know them commenting on me, being a hopeless case. I’m alone. But I don’t think it can be a major problem. If they don’t care of me, I don’t bother too. I have always been bad in social skills. Never had anyone good person as a friend. If I did, then I never talked to them much. I stayed alone. I want to increase the hopes within me. So that I can do good. Also I’m addicted to self abuse. I want to stop that. I don’t want to share anything with anyone. I hope that you will help me out of this.

Ans. First of all, start thinking in a positive and an optimistic way. Think about yourself and your strengths and talents that you have. You may not have achieved much in formal education so far but that does not mean that you do not have talents. Search for them and polish them further. Secondly, be sure that engineering is your right choice for career. You ought to be good in mathematics and physics for engineering. If not choose another option. Each one is cut out for different careers as they possess different gifts given by God. Each one must search for them and build a life with it. Thirdly, search for good company as your friends. Friends should be such who will inspire you and are talented and confident. It is not good to be alone and stay alone as it leads to depressive tendencies. Your bad habits will go once you stay in good company. A few sessions of counselling will help you understand yourself better and set your priorities right. Set a few goals for self improvement and start working on them.

S.E.

Q. My state of mind is depressed since two years. Whatever I wanted I did not get. I did not want too much but that too was not going for me. What should I do? I do not want to live and feel like suicide. Nobody understands me. My parents have no time for me. They are working or else fighting with themselves. I do not tell them anything about my life. I am studying well and doing my college. But I have no one to share and no girl friend too. I liked a girl but she refused me. Do I need help and treatment?

Ans. This is a serious condition and I would advise you to seek help immediately. Two years is a very long time to sit over a problem. It saps your energy, lowers down your day to day functioning, hampers your social communication and friendships, it makes you lonelier than you already are, and makes life seem hopeless and meaningless. It drives out the pleasures of life totally. In fact at this age you should be bubbling with energy and ideas looking forward to building a great career. You should be in the company of friends and enjoying your free time. Just the reverse seems to be happening for you are suffering from a disease called depression. You should visit a psychologist for assessment of your state of mind and other personality factors. There are good/effective methods for treatment for depression through counselling and psychotherapy. If medicines are required the psychologist would make a referral to a psychiatrist.