A.S (via email)
Q. I am 26 years old girl in love with a boy since 10 years. He is a son of my maternal uncle. My problem is that I want to marry him, his parents agree but my mother is not in agreement and I think she will never agree for this because this type of marriage is not accepted in our caste. We deeply love each other and don’t want marry someone else. Please guide me so that everyone will be happy and united.
Ans. This is surprising that his parents agree but your mother does not. It should be a matter of time that your mother too should slowly give in and agree to it since everyone else seems to be favourable to the proposal. You must try convincing your mother first and then could set for yourself a time frame for waiting and for your mother too and then go ahead with your marriage. Perhaps that is the best thing to do since your age is already advanced. But be sure that you too are well suited to each other and have high levels of commitment.
V. Deshmukh (Amravati, via email)
Q. I am SSC, 10th appeared. I am a slow learner with Math’s. I could cope up with 10th std. maths because of special individual coaching from my teacher. Unfortunately he is no more. Please guide me whether to drop math in eleventh and twelveth std? I wish to appear for competitive exams and became IAS but at the same time I want to take professional course. I read in last Hitavada education times about bio-medical engineering but it needs maths. I am in dilemma now. Help me to know what options I have, if I skip math.
Ans. There are two options for you, one would be to look for a good tutor and try maths. The other would be to drop maths and take biology and do a graduation and then prepare for your competitive exams. There is no point in doing a professional course if you want to join the administrative services. This career line is totally different and you would never use your professional training. It would only be a colossal waste. I would suggest you come for career consultation and guidance since there are many more factors that need to be taken into account before making specific suggestions which cannot be discussed here.
R.K.K (via email)
Q. I am a student of class viii from C.B.S.C pattern. I am very weak in science and maths. I am not able to understand how to learn and practise these subjects because I am not able to score good marks in both the subjects. I want to make a career in science. Please guide me how to improve in these two subjects.
Ans. If you are very weak in science and maths there is no point in pursuing a career in science in future. You must get your Aptitude Test done to know whether you have the ability for science or not. If case you do not have the scientific aptitude then you have an option to appear for your high school exams ( 8,9 and 10th) from the National Institute for Open Schooling (NIOS). This is a school where you have the option of dropping difficult subjects and choosing other subjects. Since no Board (whether State or Centre) allows you any choice regarding subjects as all subjects are compulsory, only NIOS allows a choice of subjects. Your parents would have to get involved in this decision. Discuss this alternative with them first and you could ask them to consult me further about the details of this choice as well as other choices. You could try taking coaching from a good tutor but if you are very weak in these subjects it may not help much.
Published in The Hitavada Emotions Column – 06 June 2010