“Avoid frivolous behaviour”- 14 April 2013


Q. I love a girl who is committed with someone else but she says that she is in love with me too. I have told her to breakup with the guy, who is in a relationship with her. But she says that I can’t do it because I love him too and can’t tell him, as I cannot hurt him and I have promised him. So what is the solution to this? I truly love her and she too loves me, it’s just that I have entered in her life a little later than that guy. So please help me.

Ans.  motions for 21 April 2013.

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This is a tricky situation which can happen to some people. She may like you more than the other guy for if she was very happy with the first one she would not have looked at you. But she does not seem to have the heart and the guts to tell her first friend and is afraid to hurt him. This is also a natural human dilemma for many. One way would be to avoid her completely till she makes up her mind to break off and be with you. Another way would be to minimise the communication and let her take her time. There is not third way. Pushing and trying to hassle her into breaking off with him may not work as she might become more stubborn and angry with you. So wait for your lady luck to shine.


Q. I am a student of well known institute of Nagpur. I want to become a doctor but I am in love with a girl of my class she is a topper of the class. I wanted to tell her my feeling but I am unable to talk to her. I want to score nice rank in NEET as well as in boards but she is always in my mind while studying I starts thinking of her. I am confused whether to tell her my feeling or not. But I am afraid of getting rejected -now I have two objectives in my life- 1 to score good marks and 2 is to tell her. I don’t want to mess all this because it is effecting directly indirectly to my life.

Ans. Focus on the first goal first and study well. Do not tell her your feelings now as both of you might get into a mess as emotional stuff has a tendency to escalate and you won’t know where to stop. You seem to be a serious minded person and medicine is a serious branch of study which requires all your energies. So do not divert your energies into love affairs and matters of the heart. However you could keep talking to her in a healthy happy manner without making it serious and complicated. Be good friends and encourage each other to do better in studies. She is also a topper so she would appreciate your sincerity of intent. Avoid any frivolous behaviour.

Q. I have appeared for the tenth board exams (cbse) and I am unable to decide to choose my future studies. I am expecting a 90%+ result. Please guide me.

Ans. It is time for aptitude testing and career planning. Majority of students have this normal dilemma of choosing the best and the right career. This is a common enough confusion in the minds of many students and the best way to go about it is to get your aptitude measured through psychometric tests and then go for career guidance. We are doing it all the time and you could get in touch with my centre for your appointment. As mentioned we first test your aptitude in eight areas, and after the analysis guide you with the best choices of career depending upon your interest areas and your personality traits. The student along with parents is invited for the discussion and decision making. This is the most scientific way of going about career planning.

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