“Careers can be changed mid-way”- 4 October 2015.
Q. I am 18 years old and I have just completed my 12th standard. I want to become a photographer but my parents are forcing me to get into engineering. They have already paid the fees for an engineering college and have sacrificed a lot to get me into that college. But I know that even if I get into this college I won’t be able to perform well. What do you think I should do?
Ans. According to my information photography is not taught as a degree course but just a diploma or a certificate course. It is a very good career with lots of scope in future but a degree could be important for your parents. You must tell your parents that you don’t want to pursue your career as an engineer and that you wish to become a photographer. You should have told them this before they paid the fees but now since they have already paid the fees you must still tell them your mind. You can go for a compromise by doing the engineering and joining photography as a hobby somewhere. Being honest with your parents will help you in the long run. This sure wouldn’t be easy but your parents will eventually realise that doing photography as a hobby could grant you an alternative career.
Q. I am 32 years old and I am married. I have 2 children. A couple of days ago I had a huge fight with my wife regarding coming home late from office every night. She thinks I have an affair with my colleague in office. My colleague was my girlfriend in college and we were in a very serious relationship. My wife knows about this and every time I come home late she feels that I was with my colleague. To take out my anger I slept with my colleague in my office the next day. If I tell my wife she will give me a divorce. I love my children a lot and I can’t live without them. I regret what I did. Please tell me what should I do?
Ans. Oh dear! This is an amazing way to hurt two women in one go! You hurt and betrayed your wife as well as hurt the other woman too. You used her for your own emotion and now you regret it. Well, at least you have realised your mistake and have decided to be honest and true to your wife. The best thing to do is to forget the episode and live in the present. Although it is important to be honest and truthful to your wife, you telling her the truth may perhaps do more harm and damage than good.
Q. I am 27 years old and I am jobless and unmarried. Every time I am about to fall asleep weird thoughts enter my head like ‘I am not going to be successful in my life’, ‘nobody will marry me’, ‘ my parents will disown me’ and so on. I am not able to sleep because of these disturbing thoughts. What should I do?
Ans. You seem to be getting into a state of anxiety due to your life situation. Have you ever considered becoming self employed or becoming an entrepreneur? To begin with you should engage yourself in some productive work either a hobby or a part time job with some friend. Being busy with some professional work will keep you occupied and also give you ideas to become self employed. Control your anxieties and think out of the box. Teach or coach students in a subject of your choice, at least you will earn some pocket money.
Q. I am 20 years old and my parents gave me the freedom to choose my own career. I always wanted to become a doctor. After my 12th I chose the medical field and I have completed 2 years of this course. During these 2 years, I failed many subjects and now I feel that the pressure is too much and I cannot cope with it. Keeping in mind the amount of fees they paid for the college I feel guilty to tell them since I don’t come from a well to do background. I feel depressed all day. What do I do?
Ans. There are two ways of dealing with it. One is to keep calm and work a little harder towards your goal since you choose this line. Don’t lose self confidence and try to surround yourself with motivated people so that you develop the interest in it again. The second option is to take a serious decision and change your career line. But that has to be done in consultation with either your parents or after an aptitude test and career counselling. Come for a session with us for career guidance. A change has to be done with only after deep deliberations.