Emotions for 12 January 2014.-
Q. I am constant reader of your article in Hitavada. I am in 10std and in few months my Board exams would get over. I have difficulty in my career selection. I want to go in for IIT, but I am also a good author and a poet, and my poetry book is going to be released after sometime. I am also good in general knowledge and won many inter school quizzes. So please help me in my career and stream selection after 10th.
Ans. There is a system of career planning. We need to know your aptitude, your interest and your personality. Besides these three factors there are expectations of your parents, their acceptance and willingness to support you with funds and resources for your career building and your own long term dreams. It is a complex process which needs a good amount of discussion with you and your parents to arrive at the best choice. We could also throw up alternatives to the best choice. You seem to have varied interest and that is what makes it more difficult for you to decide. It is matter of your future and your entire life. A hasty and wrong choice would land you in trouble and frustration. A session of career planning would be highly recommended.
Q. I am a student of Std 12th and will be appearing for my board exams this February. I’ve been trying to meet you since long, but my schedule keeps me busy. The past year was a disaster for me. My problem is that I lost two of my most favourite people/relatives in less than a year. I was super close to both of them. Since then I’ve a problem of concentration and whenever I start studying, I can’t concentrate and I start crying. I cry a lot. While going to sleep after waking up, in the bathroom…I’ve tried Music therapy but it doesn’t seem to help. Also my group of best buddies have broken down and I am left all alone. My family is loving but my dad has a temper problem. He gets angry easily and again I start crying. I can’t concentrate and now I’m nervous about my Boards. How will I study? I feel like ending my life, but I don’t want to hurt my parents because now I know how it feels to lose a loved one and I cannot see them crying. My parents want me to study hard, even I want to but I simply cannot do so. Please help.
Ans. Human beings have the capacity to endure tremendous amount of stress and pressure. They also have the capacity to postpone things and learn to prioritise things. Your mind is still in a state of mourning for the loss of loved ones. This is a very normal human reaction and emotion. But in times of challenge like your impending board exams you need to prioritise and then concentrate. You should seek inspiration from your loved ones who are no more but who would be expecting you to do well and be a good girl. They would want you to study and show good results as a tribute to them. It would make them sad if you did not do well. Try to remember what they told you about your studies and your future. Those expectations of theirs must be fulfilled by you. Try to live up to their dreams and aims for you. That is the way to show your love for them. Just mourning for them will do no good to you or their memory. All the best to you.