“Failure does not define you”- 10 February 2019.

A.V Q. I completed graduation in 2018 and after that I took 6 month coaching for GATE. I have no expectations from these gate 2019 but I am sure I can make it AIR 1 in GATE 2020. But my parents wants me to score good in these 2019 exam gate only but problem is my all concepts are clear but I need more time to practice that’s why I am aiming for gate 2020. I am afraid how to face my parents after result of 2019 gate and sometimes negative thoughts come to mind that whether I will make it in next attempt or not. Please help me what to do. Ans. You must give it your best shot this year and repeat it next year too. Inform your parents that you are planning to do your best and leave the rest to your results. Never be afraid to face your parents for they show you the truth and it is good to face the truth. Never allow negative thoughts to come your way at any time. Failures are always temporary and spur us to do better and never lose in the long run. Always keep your mind on long term goals and short term too. A simple failure of an examination of a year is no big deal. A failure does not define your capabilities or your life. Failures are to be taken in stride and one must work harder to hone skills and achieve good results. P.S Q. I am feeling like ending my life and keep crying all the time. My friends are good to me and support me but I cannot show my face to my parents. They are wondering what is wrong with me and I made a story of fighting with my (girl) friend. I found out that my boyfriend is cheating me with another girl since long time. I don’t know since when he is doing this. I feel I have spoiled my life and did not listen to my friends. They had warned me that he does not seem to be a good guy and I did not listen to them. He is a working person and much elder to me. I wanted to marry him as he had promised me that he loves me and wants to marry me. But my life has been destroyed by this man and I have nothing to live for. Please guide me madam. Ans. This is a most unfortunate situation. It is natural for you to feel depressed and out of your mind since you are the victim of cheating and betrayal. But rest assured that life does not end with the sins of one stupid man who has no character and no integrity. It is no fault of yours if someone cheats you. You are the victim of someone’s immorality. Since it is not your fault at all you have no need to be in a negative mood for long time. Get out of the bad experience, learn lessons from it and get going with life. Life is a great teacher and gives us experience to make us wiser. We do not desire bad experiences as we always desire good things to happen to us but they don’t always happen the way we want it to happen. Focus on what you can control in your life and that one thing is your own Mind. You cannot control events and you cannot control the behaviour of other people. Leave it to others to deal with their life the way they want to. You take care of yourself and be positive always.

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