Failures take their own toll – 14 Feb 2010

Sanket Nagpur (via email)

Q. I’m writing this letter because I really need your help. You’re the only person who knows me well enough to give me guidance for my future life. My problem is regarding my career. What happened with me is I completed my SSC with 66% but I was unable to clear my maths then I gave supplementary exam. After that I took admission in Polytechnic. I completed my poly 1st year with 65%.But I was unable to clear my 2nd year so I have been Discontinued (DC) for a year. So you can comprehend my frustration. I am 20 years old now. I am worried about my future. I do not smoke or drink what I mean to say is there are no such bad Habits. My aim in life is that I want to work with telecommunication Companies like [Nokia, apple technologies, Nortel networks etc}. Will I be able to fulfill my aim?

Ans. You have not planned your career well and therefore you are suffering. When maths was already a weak subject at the high school level for you, you still went and opted for polytechnic! That was a bad choice according to me. There are so many options for career making and all roads lead to success if desired. Now that you are already in 2nd year it would be advisable for you to continue and complete your diploma by sheer hard work. Take the help of good coaches and teachers who will guide you appropriately. I am glad you have no bad habits and have high aims. Do not get depressed and do not think negative. Bad phases always pass and time is a great healer. Be patient and brave. 

Abhi (via email)

Q. I am a 2nd year student of MCA. I am in big trouble now. I have failed in 3rd semester in 2 subjects but according to new rule of nagpur university for mca if the subject in which  pass  has marks less than 50 then that subject is also do a 2nd attempt. i have to attempt 4 subject of 3rd sem with 5 subject of 4th semester. now i not understand what to do? how to deal with parents? please help me.

Ans. Failure has its own repercussions. Hence as a student you are advised to attend your classes regularly, focus only on studies, cut off from friends and friendships, stop socialising and wasting time. Career building is serious business and studies is for gaining knowledge and not only passing exams. If you have not gained enough knowledge you deserve to fail. It is as simple as that. So change your attitudes towards your studies, take them seriously, and focus all your energies on them. First clear your 3rd semester and then on the 4th semester. As far as parents are concerned they also suffer emotionally as you fail so go and apologise to them and make a promise. 

Scorpio (via email)

Q. I am 19 years old & studying in BCCA-I. I am kind of shy, due to that I don’t have much friends & sometimes I feel very lonely. But I don’t know why, from couple of days a weird kind of thought coming in my mind that in future when ” I’ll get married my wife will cheat on me” I haven’t thought about it before or I never felt like that. This is distracting me from my studies & to achieve my goals. This thought is making me depress and crazy, in nights I can’t even sleep properly. I keep on thinking about it. Mostly I cope-up with my problem on my own without anyone’s help, but in this I am unable to do so. Please help me.

Ans. It seems you have got into an obsessive thought. You would need to consult me as soon as possible for a stitch in time saves nine. The earlier you get out of it the better. Do not allow it to linger. If treated now you would be relieved of it soon. However do not worry for we take care of such things with psychological counseling.

Published in Hitavada Insight – 14 Feb 2010

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