“Get out of the inertia”- 21 October 2018

D.S

Q. I had an accident a few months ago and was hurt –my leg broke and I was almost dead. But was saved by luck. Now my problem is that my leg hurts and my mind is sick with many thoughts running in my head. I don’t want to go to work, I feel tired and scared of going out. My wife drives the car and takes me to office and picks me back too. She tells me that I am okay to drive on my own and the doctor too tells me to get back to normal life. What should I do? What is wrong with me? Have I become a case for counselling? Please guide me.

Ans. There is something called ‘post trauma stress’ and you seem to be suffering from it. Most victims of accident might undergo similar experiences of losing confidence, anxiety about driving on the road again, feeling helpless and dependent on loved ones and wanting to be cared for by the spouse. This happens when your mind refuses to get out of being the ‘sick patient’ and refuses to believe that you are normal and healthy. Work on your mind and build your strengths again and start doing small rounds on your vehicle. Take a short trip outside for a few minutes and then venture out to work/office as soon as you feel well. When you take short trips you will feel better immediately. It is only the initial hesitation that is difficult. Break out of the inertia and get going! It is your life and you must live it. Bad things don’t happen all the time and should never be taken as a deterrent! So cheer up and boost yourself. If it does not work, come for a few sessions.

H.G

Q. I am a young girl and my hair is turning grey already. This has put fear in me. My parents point it out to me and make fun. I don’t know how I should take it. My mother says I should not worry and not say anything to them but it hurts me and wonder why this is happening to me? Why God is unkind to me so much. I am a simple and good girl and I listen to my parents and do my duty well as they tell me. What will happen to me when I grow up and who will marry me for my friends say that nobody will marry me. Please guide me madam.

Ans. Greying of hair may be due to several reasons and one of them is genetic. If you have a parent or a close family member who has this problem it may be coming from there. Or else speak to a doctor and find out the reasons of early greying of hair. I know many people who begin to grey very early and there is nothing much you could do about it except changing shampoos and hair oils which may have limited affect. Changing your diet may help to some extent and accepting it may be the best remedy. When you grow up and start college you could start using ‘colour’ to even it out as most start doing –that takes care of your fears of not being able to find a groom to marry! These days it has become a common enough practice to colour the hair and why not do it rather than lose confidence! Stop worrying and start enjoying the present to your best ability and stop fretting about boys and the future. Everyone finds a mate and so will you!

ABC.

Q. I have too many bad thoughts in my mind and I am troubled by them. I am a college student and I seem to be different from other boys in some ways. Of course they all talk about girls and all that what young people talk about but my mind is more affected by bad thoughts. They keep coming to my head all the time and distracting me. I have tried everything.. nothing seems to be helping me. It is irritating to me and makes me feel sick and depressed. I see my friends laughing and enjoying life and having interest in so many things. I am thinking of only one thing?? Please help if there is a medicine or something I will take it.

Ans. This seems to be like an obsession and needs treatment in terms of psychological counselling. This does happen to a certain percentage of people and is troubling to them for it disrupts normal living and makes you unhappy. Please take an appointment as soon as possible and come for psychotherapy. Energies need to be channelized into proper and healthy avenues so that you will get a feeling of goodness and happiness and not feel miserable as you are feeling now. You need to explore your inner self deeply and rid yourself of negative unhealthy obsessions. We might consider medicine if needed.

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