Q. I am totally confused about my career. My parents say something and my friends say another thing. My parents want me to take commerce and become a CA because my father is one. I am more into arts and humanities and other interests like literature and English language. No one encourages me for it and tease me for it. I am very unhappy and confused and depressed. Is it bad to do arts and will I not be able to earn anything? They say no one will respect me. Please show me some hope.
Ans. Arts and humanities are great courses to learn and study. It has many subjects as an option. English language, as well as other languages are great to opt for and make a career in. If you like teaching and lecturing then of course you can make a career in it and is a good line for girls. If you are not interested in teaching then we would need to know your interest areas in career making where English language can be of much use, such journalism and mass media, corporate communications, electronic media, advertising, creative writing, content writing, translations etc. There is a market for such skills and English being an international language is an asset. Be proud to be an arts student and go ahead with your head held high. Bring your parents for counselling if they are not convinced.
Q. I had a bad accident when I was in college. It made me to walk with a limp in my walk. I did not bother about such things when I was studying but now when I think of my marriage I hesitate. I feel like no confidence in me and my personality. My parents feel I have many good offers from girls but I refuse to meet them. I am afraid they will laugh at me and not like me. I have been rejected once. What should I do? Please should I come for counselling?
Ans. Yes, counselling will help us understand the negativity in your mind and manage it by getting rid of it and developing a healthy attitude and personality. Many people have poor body image which may be based on social prejudices and stereotyping. Fair skin is better than brown even though we are Asians-Indians; thin is better than plump because the models and film stars set the trend; good features and good looks are important for good life is nonsense and so on. A damaged leg due to an accident may be a slight disadvantage to you in terms of restricting your activities such as fast walking or running but the fact that you have two legs and can walk with a limp is great. Choose a girl who will accept you wholeheartedly and will accept your good points of personality. Always inform the other party honestly of your story and let them adapt to it. We all live with some sort of handicap, whether it is physical, mental, social, or economic. Please don’t worry about minor handicaps- no one is perfect and a wise lady will understand that. Meanwhile think positive, develop your strengths and look forward to a happy future.
Q. I am afraid of Maths and I feel I cannot pass even my 10 std in the subject. I get scolding all the time and my Father tells me to pass school somehow and get into polytechnic. There again I will have to do maths but he is not listening. He says if I work hard I can and after polytechnic I should get into engineering. He is wanting to make me an engineer somehow. He could not become an engineer and so he wants me to make him proud. I feel like suicide and or running away from home. I feel like dying and going to hell. I am not thinking of anything else. Please help me.
Ans. Oh dear! You are in a tight spot with your Father’s obsession and insistence of making you an engineer! If Maths is tough for you in 10th Std, then it is best for you to drop it in the next level and do not opt for polytechnic nor engineering. It is not everyone’s cup of tea and it cannot be forced. I think you need to stand up for yourself and tell them in whatever way he understands that you will not do engineering or polytechnic. Request help from your mother, brother, sister, uncle, aunt, teacher or neighbour! Ultimately you can come for counselling and we will test your aptitude and convince your father. Do not think or talk about suicide, it is better to shout and scream and be heard. Don’t give up.