“Lead your own life”- 23 July 2023

DH, Nagpur

Q. I’m an 18 year- old boy. I am in standard twelfth, science stream. My parents don’t live together, I live with my father. My parents aren’t divorced though, they just live separately and I meet my mother occasionally. However, I miss her and really wish to be able to live with my mother and father both. Lately all this has started bothering me so much that I am unable to concentrate while studying. I feel like crying but fear that everyone will judge me.

Ans. The situation is certainly unfortunate and sad. But when couples fight and separate out, children like you suffer for you must love them both. But there is nothing you can do much for them to reconcile. You must have tried talking to them both about settling their conflicts and disagreements by now with no positive results. The best is to accept the situation and make the most of it. Keep touch and contact with both of them. Meet them frequently if not daily. Talk on the mobile often. You are already 18 years of age and will enter college soon. Your life will take a turn as you become an adult. Focus on making friends, building hobbies and developing your personality. Study hard and make a good career. The best way is to control and regulate your emotions and think logically. Perhaps it is best for them to stay apart. Perhaps they do not make a happy couple together and need to separate out. Perhaps staying together will be a major compromise for them and therefore unhealthy. This is when you think logically about the whole thing and accept the reality. Keep your emotions positive and under control. Do not get into depression and spoil your life. Get going with your own life.


Q. I work in corporate sector as consultant. My manager says ‘he and me share sibling’s bond’.  We fight, argue as professionals then settle down but since some days his behaviour is bothering me, he is sharing awkward talks like nude in washroom/bed….etc , stalking my status and replying why he is doing like this we both are single.

Ans. He has lost his head and is stalking you now. If you work in the same office, it becomes difficult to ignore him and disassociate completely. Not much option is there for you but to threaten him with a complaint/ exposure to the HRD department if he continues his harassment. There must be in place the Act against sexual harassment of women in the workplace. You can evoke the Act against him and he will lose his job. Therefore, first threaten him with your intent and if he does not stop his nonsense, make the complaint.  

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