Q. I am very much in tension now. I am in class 10th std and I am not able to concentrate on my studies at all. Actually my mind always goes on another way when I got to studies. I did very big mistakes in my life by which my parents are very disappoint from me and why I am not felling guilty at all I don’t know. I did the same mistake many times and make my parents very disappoint. I am very much attracted towards boys and I always say lie to my parents. I do stole money from home and my parents got to know that I stole money from home. They are very hurt. I don’t know what to do I want to change myself because I m not a good girl at all. I don’t have any manners to talk to my dad and mom I don’t put my things properly. I want to do lots of study and want to prove my parents that I can do it but whenever I make any time-table for study or any promises regarding studies I can’t fulfil it. I am just an average student. But my parents says that If I will do hard work I will get above 90%. Mam please help me because of my bad thinking, my bad nature, my bad manner, I am very much disturbed and want to change myself totally. I am not able to control my brain. I never have peace in my mind. I take very small things very seriously and thinks too much about that. And please give me some tips for concentrating on studies. I am not able to study at all. One more problem is there I want to look good but I am very fat and not able to control my diet I eat lots of junk food. One more thing I am in relationship now.
Ans. You would need some sessions of counselling so that all your problems can be addressed. Request your parents for the same and if they believe you are serious they will support you in your effort. Concentration is the art of focusing on one thing at a time and leaving out the rest. Dedicate another bit of time for your other thoughts too so that they get the attention they seek. Everything needs time and attention. So begin with the principle- one thing at a time.
Q. I am a B.E. final year student of ETC branch. I am a student with 60% aggregate till my 3rd year. I have opted for a masters degree in the same domain and also joined coaching classes for it. But now- a- days I am confused about my decision. I am not 100% sure about it. And due to this feeling I am in a state of dilemma and not able to concentrate on my studies. I don’t want to discuss this with my parents right now and put them in any sort of tension. Every day I need to convince myself that I have to do masters in engineering, which makes me feel restless and stressed. I am not able to decide what to do and where to proceed. At present I am attending regular tuition and studying regularly. Please help.
Ans. We have a simple way of conducting a personality test on you to help you choose your long goal. It is advisable to make the right choice at this junction before you join the programme. If doubts have already cropped up in your mind then it is right of you to feel concerned about the rightness of your decision.
Q. I am in love with a guy. He is my dance class friend. He proposed me last year. At that time I’ve no feelings for him but then also I accepted his proposal. We are of same age but he leaves his studies & continue his dance line. I strongly believe in studies for future support & I leave my dance line. (I’m doing CMA + B.com 2nd yr.) My mother knows about him & advise me to leave this relation. I also promised to my mother. Whenever I stop talking with him or get angry on him he do suicide attempts from which mentally I get very disturbed but finally I explain my situation to him & he understand my situation. He cannot forgot me till & I also not forgot him. We stop talking completely from march of this year. But now suddenly I’m missing him so much can’t control myself, very tough situation for me to concentrate in my studies. If once I start talking with him he cannot leave me again & the same problem comes in my life.
Ans. Love, although a difficult emotion to control can be postponed. Make your career first and then decide about the fellow. You believe in studies and that takes up a lot of mental energy. Focus on your studies and better not to open the communication lines. Be wise.