“Set career goals”- 9 June 2019

I.K

Q. I Have Celebrity (Model&Serial Star) Friend On Social Media, We Talk Everyday He Treats Me As His Close Friend Not A Fan. Suddenly I Received Follow Request Of His Close Friend, I Accept Too But He Started Dirty Talks &Made Unjustified Demand Of V.Call (In Objectionable Condition).I Blocked Him. My Friend Is Involved/He Is Doing All This?!!! Though He Never Talked Directly Like This To Me But Used To Say I’m Beautiful & My Pics Particularly Which He Liked His Friend Too Has Liked Shall I Block Him Too!!!!?

Ans. I have written more than once about these types of deception on the social media. How do you know that the guy you are talking to is actually the same model and serial star? This seems to a common strategy of enticing young girls into friendship which seems to be decent and polite and then using sweet lovey talks for requesting for your pictures. Once you fully trust the person and put your faith and belief in him he betrays you. He may be part of a big group of men and boys who are enjoying your pictures and your silly romantic talk with the fellow. Of course you need to block all such characters and strangers and not indulge in any kind of friendship nor share pictures. Do not create any risk for yourself and your life for future and keep yourself limited to known people in your neighbourhood and city. Trust the boys in your college and your community, they are safer.

P.D Jabalpur.

Q. I am a 17 year old guy with a dream to represent team INDIA in cricket but have no support of parents. My parents want me to become an Army officer because my father is an ex Army man. So please kindly help me. I will be grateful to you.

Ans. This is a matter of great deliberations. A career choice needs assessment of talents, reality testing in terms of probability of success and the consensus of all in the family specially parents. You need to assess your achievements in the field of cricket so far since you are already 17 in age. How much of your talent in cricket have you honed and displayed in matches and competitions? What is the evaluation of your cricket coach about your future? We need more details to make a decision about whether you should choose cricket or any other career. Army is a good choice but quite different from the love for cricket! You must choose the career of your choice whether cricket or any other. Cricket and such games where you play for the country have no scope for mediocrity or ordinariness -you need to be the best in your field. Other common careers have scope for the ordinary and mediocre talents too where life can be secure and steady. Your family would help by getting into an open ended discussion about your career by discussing all possibilities and all choices open to you without any emotions biases. If you get stuck with cricket and your father with the Army no common ground will be covered. Drop biases and discuss with logic and reasoning considering all pros and cons of all choices. We can help you with an aptitude test and a counselling session to help you make the best choice for your future.

K.S

Q. My son is just not interested in studies. He has gone to std 10 and says he is not interested in studies. We know he has the ability to study but fail to understand him. He is like this since few years. He likes to play and roam with friends. He also sticks to his mobile and plays games on it. We are troubled parents. Please suggest some remedy.

Ans. We need to find out the reasons for loss of interest in studies. There could be many possible reasons. One could be a condition of learning difficulties such as difficulty in specific subjects such as maths, science or English or any other. The second could difficulty in concentration, comprehension, memory, writing expressions or many more areas of concern. It could also be a reflection of emotional reasons such as depression, anger and other emotional disturbances. Please bring him once for counselling and if he does not agree for it bring him for an aptitude test for career planning. Giving him a clear goal will also help him tremendously to focus and look forward to a clear goal. There are careers for all types of talents and abilities. We need to assess them through an aptitude test and give him a focus to look forward to.

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