“Accept the situation”- 27 July 2014.

Anonymous

Q: I know a girl classmate for last 3 years very closely and she knows me too.  We did not express our love directly, but indirectly we share so much feelings. After graduation we parted for different university, and we did not meet for last one year. Now, she text messages to me and calls often. I think she still loves me, and I love her a lot. Help me. Is she in love with me or not? And till now I have not loved any other girl. We both are M.A. students.

Ans. Well both of you are mature enough to know and understand each others’ emotions. Your association has been a long one and quite sincere and pure I would say as both of you concentrated on your studies and kept away from absurd involvements. Both of you are now in post graduation stage which is a good age to consider seriously the issue of marriage. She seems to be interested in you as a good friend but it would be difficult for me to predict her attitude and values about the issue of marriage. If you feel you both share the same or quite similar views on marriage then she may be considering you as a partner for life. As you say that she is the only girl you have loved it would be worth the try to tap her on the subject gently. I would advise you not to be hasty for fear of scaring her away. Go slow and steady on the topic. I think your luck will favour you.

P.P. Raipur

Q. I am a student of class 12th and I have opted for PCM. I have opt for these subjects with my own wish but now I find maths (of JEE exam) as a difficult subject for me as I am preparing for JEE exam. I was a bit weak in maths till class 10th but I had chosen it because I liked it. I am also interested in biology and it was strongest part of mine but I was told that I can write PMT exam even after taking maths by taking one year drop. Now in the beginning session of class 12th I wanted to change to PCB but it was very difficult to take this decision and no one supported me. As when I sit to study I always wander in the thoughts that I must have opt for PCB because it was my stronger part and regret for the same. I have never imagined myself as a renowned engineer and so I think can never do it. I always fear of failure. Even the next year I cannot write 12th class PCB exam and prepare for PMT because my parents do not support me and it requires a lot of strength to go against everything and everyone which I lack. I have been given many other options about other fields but my I’m only interested in making my career in science – engineering and medical are only the renowned professions with good earning and reputation. As when I think of my future I find darkness all around and I often feel frustrated and depressed. When I want to discuss about this issue with my parents they only advise me to prepare well for 12th boards and thinking about future after exams because we had already discussed about this without drawing to a conclusion. But I cannot do this. I’m moving on with the subject which I’m not capable of. I’m not able to handle the situation and feel weird of the circumstances. I cannot help myself. I had performed my best till 10th and had scored well. I am hoping for best in my life but I think I have missed biggest opportunity in my life by not taking PCB and going for medical profession. Please help me.

Ans. This is a really bad situation to be in. I can understand your trauma and struggle to keep abreast with your studies. I feel sorry that your parents did not understand you well enough to help you make the correct decision about your future career. Now the only option seems to be to continue with your 12th with maths and appear for your board exams bravely. Without biology you cannot get into medicine until and unless you take a drop and get enrolled into 11 std all over again which will be another nightmare. But you could do that if you feel very strongly about biology and medicine. Otherwise you will have to continue with engineering somehow since you are stuck with either of the two of them.

 

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