Q. I am 19 years old guy. I dropped out of school after 12th. I had anger issues since I was 15 years old. I have hard time concentrating in everything I do. I have been diagnosed with ADHD and been to several doctors still nothing is helping. I face more issue day by day and un-satisfaction in my life is killing me. I don’t know what to do with my life as I don’t go to college also or hang-out with friends. I don’t make friends easy and I don’t like talking to people. I am not socially active also. Help me what to do and suggest me something.
Ans. You have mentioned a number of problems and we need to look into them one by one. You say there are anger issues, ADHD, lack of social outings, don’t like friends and don’t go to college also. This seems like you are locked inside the home at all times and are not moving on with life. The primary issue is to study and make a career for the moment and other things can run parallel. Your ADHD can interfere with education/studies and may obstruct you from being able to concentrate properly on the task at hand. Anger may be an ensuing emotion coming from a sense of frustration and social isolation. The inability to make friends and the absenting from college may be a secondary issue and a fall-out of your primary problem. So the problem spirals and multiples as the primary issue remain unresolved. I hope you have tried medicines for ADHD as well as meditation on a daily basis? Counselling will also help you deal with such issues. A few sessions of counselling is highly recommended for you.
Q.I am 27 years old female. I had love marriage a year before. Everything was fine and we were happy but now my husband beats me and yells on me. He treats me as if I am his slave. He already knew that I wasn’t that rich from beginning but now he demands money from my parents. I am three months pregnant and still he says that he don’t wants this child and he won’t pay for my hospital expenses. I want to divorce this man but then my parents don’t allow me. What to do now?
Ans. It is surprising that your husband has changed his colours completely and in spite of you having a ‘love marriage’ as you say, he is asking for money and being violent. Either he is under some form of stress which has induced this abnormal behaviour or he is showing his true nature of greed and aggression now after marriage. Having a child in such a situation is questionable because if your marriage is not a stable one what sort of family are you creating and what sort of home and future you will provide to your child are issues for serious thinking. Divorce is the last option but for the moment you could shift to your parents place for safety and security and then lodge a complaint with the ‘Bharosa cell’ in the police department near Ambazari/ VRCE exchange. They are a special cell for women by women police to look into domestic violence and crimes against women. They can be very helpful in setting things right without breaking the marriage. If your husband needs psychological help then bring him for counselling and we could make a diagnosis about his mental state. He is either stressed and hence ill or he is evil and morally corrupt. Either way we would know how to proceed to help you out of the situation. Do not despair, you are not alone.
Q. I am a student of science and I am not interested in doing science. My parents forced me to take the subjects and I hate going to the coaching classes too. I like playing all types of sports and specially cricket but they feel it is all useless thing to do. I cannot do science anymore and don’t like commerce too. What should I do? It seems there is no career for me at all and I will be uneducated and unemployed forever. I am depressed with my life actually. The only time I am happy is while playing. Please help me.
Ans. This is such a common problem. Parents have forced you into something you don’t like and do not have the aptitude for it. Nothing could be worse than this for a student. There are careers for everyone and now-a-days there are endless choices for students to make a life in. Do not worry. The best thing to do would be to appear for an online aptitude test with us and that is the most scientific and systematic way to plan a career and a future. When you know your abilities, your interests and your personality traits, you would be able to take the right decision for your courses of study and your future. All the best to you. Request your parents for an online aptitude test.