“Aggression can be a sign of depression”- 27 May 2018.

P.S

Q. I am from Madhya Pradesh. I have completed my 12th this year and now I am searching for good colleges. But my performance in entrance exams is not good. So I am very frustrated and afraid about my future. I am in very tension. So how can I cope with this problem, give me some tips mam.

Ans. Cultivating tension will not get you a good college if your marks are average due to low performance. Being realistic means to accept the results of your 12 Std Boards and then settling for the colleges that are open to you or else the other alternative being to take a drop and re-prepare for the entrance exams and do it well by being serious and putting in your best efforts. Worry and tension are useless emotions that only do damage and do not help in any way. So relax and think positively about your future and take wise decisions with the consent of your family. if they agree with your plan for a drop this year, you are lucky indeed. If they do not agree then go for whatever if offered to you and do well there and aim for a better college in post graduation. Best wishes to you!

MD

Q. My brother just gave his 10 th boards. He wants to pursue Car designing and he is really good at it. But is confused which stream to take now and doesn’t have any idea about the graduation programs. Are there certain entrance exams to get into designing colleges? Or is it better to do engineering first?

Ans. He could choose science for his junior college and for his under graduate program there are choices he will have to make. Either he opts for engineering in mechanical, automobile engineering or industrial design and then goes for further courses in car design/automotive design. The other option is to go for the integrated courses (5 years) in car design after 12 Std itself. He could also opt for Bachelor in design in car (B.Des courses, four years) and then go for the Masters programme (M.Des) subsequently. There are institutes all over India for such courses, such as Pune, Indore, Banglore, Hyderabad etc. A session on career guidance may be helpful for your brother. An assessment of his aptitude may be yet useful.

B.S

Q. My child is behaving funny since few years we have noticed changes and we are worried. My husband and I live in joint family and there are some differences with family. My husband suffered a stroke and fell ill for some months. He is healthy now but needs lots of attention and lives with many precautions. I have another child who is very young, only six years old, and this child is 15 years old. I am very worried about him. He flares into temper and often fights with cousins. We might shift away from joint family and is also a worry for me as to how will I handle everything. My mind often goes blank.

Ans. Children too have mental health problems and they often go unnoticed and undetected. I am glad you have noticed many changes in the behaviour of your son. These changes are significant as they indicate something. A symptom speaks of some problem. Temper and fights with cousins could indicate maladaptive behaviour due to family fights of adults, as you do mention that the joint family is under stress. You also mention the sudden illness of your husband which impact children as well as the attention of parents are diverted to handling the illness and children begin to feel neglected emotionally. The reasons could be many but the symptoms indicate depression as well besides maladjustment. Aggression is a sign of depression as well besides other factors. Please bring him for counselling as soon as possible for a stitch in time saves many. Prolonging the issue and leaving it unattended worsens it. please don’t delay, a few sessions will surely help him emote and heal his emotional disturbances.