Emotions for 29 May 2011.
“Do not be afraid of mistakes”
Q. I am in depression because I have actually I have failed in B.Com 3rd year and the condition is that I am not completed my degree about 50%. I am completely disturbed. This result perished me and therefore I am not doing my job well. Please give me suggestion.
Ans. It would be advisable for you to analyse the reasons for your failure so that you can rectify them and achieve success in the next attempt. Life is a continuous process and you have to keep on working hard towards your goals. There may be mood swings and you would feel depressed due to failures but it is never a permanent condition. One day you will succeed. It is good that you have a job to keep your fruitfully engaged. You must do your work meticulously and also study hard for your degree for it is important for your career. Cheer up and look forward to success in future.
Q. I have just passed 12th. I scored less marks. Actually I lost my mother when I was four. We are two brothers and three sisters. There is big difference in our ages. I am the younger one. So I spent most of the years with my third sister. I was very comfortable with her. I used to share all my problems and all with her. Then we shifted to Nagpur. I lost my father also (2007) then my third sister got married in 2008. Then I was like alone. I am not free with my brother and other sisters and I cannot share my problems with them. Actually the main problem is I am not confident about my decisions. They always take decisions for me and I have to follow them. I am bit kind of isolated. I feel hesitated to mix with new persons. I don’t feel comfortable with them. My family don’t understand me. So generally I share my secrets and feelings with my close friends. Now I am grown up and I want to take my own decisions but I am not confident on them. So its takes much time to take decisions and by that time I get scolded and I have to follow their decisions. So please suggest me
ma’am how to cope up with such situations and how to overcome my hesitation.
Ans. Once you get into college you will enter young adulthood. You can start taking small daily decisions and thinking about its pros and cons. Analyze the benefits and the disadvantages of a particular decision and then take a slight risk. Even if it means that you have to rebel a little bit against the general opinion of the family you may take the decision if you feel it is right. Taking a risk is an important part of taking decisions as you are responsible for the consequences of the decision. Even if you make mistakes in the decisions taken, remember that it is a learning process and even the mistakes will teach you some good things. So do not be afraid of making mistakes. Slowly your confidence will grow as you grow up and you will make right decisions that are good for you. Guidance of parents is very important and you are missing that. You could always consult your third sister on phone and take an opinion from her. She knows you better than others and may guide you properly.
Q.I was in love with a guy since 8 years but now I came to know that he has married another girl without telling me. He broke my trust. Do tell me how to overcome this. I am 22 years of age currently working as well as studying. I am very upset as well as irritated.
Ans. This is amazing but life is full of surprises. You should pick up the phone and blast him. Give him a good piece of your mind and do not be kind to him. do not spare him in your expressions of anger and betrayal. After you have done that, have a good cry and then forget about him. Do not look back and try to get busy with your life in a variety of ways. Find new friends to mingle with, read books, indulge in activities for which you had no time earlier. Try to be as happy as you can and forget the betrayer.