Q. I am a B.E final year student. I am in love with a girl who is my tenant but I confused whether she loves me or not. I am very shy in nature hence I unable to talk with her freely. I saw her talking on phone with someone on terrace. How should I know whether she love me or there is somebody else in her life. I think she is elder than me by one year and belong to other caste but it doesn’t matter to me. I am unable to concentrate on my studies. This is important year for me. Please help me as I am in big trouble.
Ans. It’s difficult to know her feelings for you in a definitive way. There could be some signs and symptoms in her behaviour that you could look for. For example does she look at at you and smile at you when she sees you, does she try to attract your attention when you go to the terrace etc. Since she is your tenant you can approach her for small things and make small talk with her. For example, ask her if she needs any type of help, ask her if she is comfortable in the house, ask her how her studies or work (whatever) is going on. There are ways of getting in touch with small things and do not express your feelings at this stage! Just be a simple, friendly, nice guy. She may begin to like you as a friend. That’s the starting point!
Q. I am a 14 years old boy. I am always confused with my resolutions what I make for myself [i.e] I make numerous resolutions and action plan[s]but I am unable to succeed a single of them. I am always confused what to do and what not to be done. I would be very much thankful if you give me some suggestions, books etc to overcome this bad habit.
Ans. Keep your resolutions simple and practical. Do not make big plans and then find them impossible to fulfill. Life is succeeding in small things and then going higher step by step. So take small simple steps for improvement and keep them one at a time. Once you succeed in one step then go to the next step. High jumps are difficult and do not happen generally! You have nor mentioned the areas of your confusion so it’s difficult to guide you in a specific manner.
Q. I am a student of 12 std and am a good student. However I am confused about my career plans. I want do many things in life and want to go higher but my parents want me to be an engineer and work in a government job. What should I do? I also want to do engineering but I don’t want to go for job. I want to start my own industry. My parents feel that I talk big things and cannot achieve it. I feel very depressed with this and fight with my parents. Please guide.
Ans. Please go step by step. Since both of you agree for the graduate course in engineering, please focus on that first. Clear your 12 std with good marks and also prepare for the entrance exams well so that you can get a good reputed college of engineering. After that you could work in a job for a few years for experience and then get started as an entrepreneur. This is the right way to plan it out. It’s good to dream big and aim high but it’s also necessary to be practical and have your feet on the ground for the moment. Neither you nor your parents are wrong- both are right!