“It is alright to be rejected”- 9 February 2014


Q.I am an engineering student and currently in 2nd year. Last year I scored heavily and everything was fine till then. But in second year my performance is going below-par. I don’t know what actually is distracting me from my aim. In the college almost every of my classmate has a GF (or at least they pretend to be) but I have no one. Moreover, I like one but she directly rejected my proposal which resulted in a great emotional trauma. Now I started feeling depressed, disappointed and lost. I face her daily as she is my classmate and when she came across me I felt very guilty. Due to all these circumstances happening all around I’m facing an emotional trauma. Please, Ma’am help me to come out of this problem otherwise it is sucking every ounce of energy out of me. I’m not able to focus on my studies as well resulting in worst ever performance. Even anybody can easily guess the change in my behaviour. It has changed abruptly. I know all this but still am not able to cope with it. Ma’am you are now the ray of hope and I’m sure that you’ll surely help me cope with it. Seeking your early reply.

Ans. It may be a blessing in disguise! It is certainly not a good feeling to be rejected but if you take it positively it may be a good thing for you not to have a girl friend at this juncture. Relationships such as these only distract students from their goal in life as you have already experienced the trauma of losing. You were a happy person and scored heavily as you say but this specific distraction has made you disturbed. At the right time the right girl will enter your life and give you happiness. Do not worry about the habits of your peers and stay focused on your studies and goals in life. Do not follow the herd and walk alone with confidence. Say hello to her if you meet her and show her that you are happy in spite of her rejection. It is alright to be rejected in life. We all face it.


Q. Although I want to study I fail to do so. It may be because of lack of dedication and laziness. I am losing the identity in school. I want to be in good list of my teachers. Help me mam! What should I do? How should I proceed? How to concentrate properly? I am an 11th standard student (MPC). I was one of the toppers in 10th in my school. But now I am not able to concentrate on studies. I always get disturbed by small things and I am facing a constant negative graph. Help me- I want to be one of the toppers in 12th.
Ans. If you were a good student in 10th you can be one in 11th too. Find out a few things about the causes for distraction –have you chosen the right subjects or have you made wrong choices. Secondly if you have made the right choice then what are the other factors that distract you? An analysis of the factors will help you deal with them effectively. It is good to have high aims in life and think of yourself in a positive manner. Remove all distractions and focus only on one goal of your studies. That is the only way to do it. Best wishes.


Q. I am in class 11th of a good school and I have opted science stream. It is a dream to be a cricketer. I had time to devote to cricket till class 10th. Now, my parents and teachers advice me to get into a good engineering college and till then do not play cricket at all. Can you guide me for pursuing a career in the field of sports.

Ans. There is no scope for a great career for mediocre players in sports. You have to be an excellent sportsman to make a successful career in sports. Therefore many youngsters have made their life miserable by opting for sports but not reaching high enough. They then drop out after some years. The other general careers offer a future for all types of people, the high achievers as well as the mediocre ones too. Therefore there is more security in other careers in comparison to sports. It would be advisable to talk to your coach about your calibre and your future in cricket and then convince your parents. An expert who knows you can be a good guide to assess your talents and also convince your parents. If your parents agree you could experiment for a few years with cricket and then take a decision. That depends on so many factors which need to be considered.


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