“Make a success of your life”- 7 December 2014.
Q. I am 4 year student and jobless. Mam at my home there are frequent quarrels between my parents. My father is very short tempered and no one can stop him; and mother don’t listen she want the things to go by her way. Quarrel means serious one with uttering bad words, beating. In this I fell very alone no one listen to me, I feel to run away or commit suicide. But when this feeling come I see my brother who is 1 year student and lives in other district, what he will do? How will the things go for him? and that stops me. I told my parents to live separately. But it didn’t work. I cannot concentrate on my studies and really worried about my future. So please me as soon as possible.
Ans. The best thing to do is to study hard and get into a job and be independent. Most times children cannot do much to control parents and their bad behaviour. Children are victims of such bad marriages and suffer emotionally. But as you grow up you should learn to ignore their quarrels and get going with your own live. You must also cleanse your mind of negative affects and be positive. Do not get into the trap of negativity which ensures from bad homes. Life is beautiful and you can learn to live it well. Some people just do not know how to live their lives making themselves and others miserable. Never think in extremes of ending your life. Make a success of your life.
Q. I am a class 11 student preparing for AIPMT. I am finding it difficult to adjust with the course and perform good in tests. I think may be my way of studying is not fit for Class 11 and 12 and Aipmt. It’s been 5 months that my classes have started and now teaching is on full swing. I have hectic schedule but somehow manage to get 7-8 hrs to study. Also as I am not scoring good marks I am constantly losing my moral. I am at lack of inspiration. How hard I try to study I end up wasting time. The feeling that “I really need to study hard ” has been lost completely. Please help me out and tell me how to build my moral and feel motivated all the time coz I really want to study!! And suggest proper way of studying for my entrance.
Ans. Low motivation can be due to many reasons. Find out the primary reason for your lowered motivation by exploring your mind. There could be several causes that are leading to this. If you find the PMT subjects tough or boring or tedious you might rethink your career plans. You might think of dropping medicine and doing something else or at least keeping another option open after 12 std. If you find it interesting then you might improve your study methods and your time management. If you cannot do it yourself come for a session of counselling and we can help you do it.
Q. Presently I am doing my two year diploma in automobile engineering. Madam now- a- days our 3rd semester examination is going on. Madam yesterday we had our engineering drawing exam I was thoroughly prepared but don’t know what happened for first 1 hour of our exam I was going well but after that I got confused and I lost my confidence still I tried to give my best. But lost it ! Madam as I am alone girl in my college doing automobile engineering every teacher is expecting good result from me. Last year I have 1 subject as a back log this year I gave its exam again. When I told this to my parents they started blaming me but this time I was prepared. Now no one trust me even my friends and my best friend too. I am getting depressed now and now I feel that this year also I will get 3 subjects in backlog. And now I am thinking to leave this world. I was always an average student. What I should now. Please help me.
Ans. Why should small failures lead you to think of ending your life? Life is precious and needs to be handled well. Small ups and downs will happen and such situations challenge you to do better and improve your style and methods of learning. You may be getting anxious due to others expectations from you and also due to the fact of being the lone girl. Yes this is stressful to be in a male dominated profession and to compete with the boys. Take it easy and learn to control your anxieties and fears by doing relaxation exercise for calming the mind and physical exercises for fitness and energising yourself. Learn to think positive even in adverse situations and keep improving self slowly. Even if you get backs in subjects complete your course. You might take a few months or a year more but you will qualify. It is important to keep marching ahead even in defeat.