Making difficult choices – 5th July 2020


“Making difficult choices”

rk gupt.

Q. I am 34 years old, I was always an average student working in the Middle East since 2017. my father passed away 10 years ago.  I have seen many money related difficulties. We are four siblings. my elder sister, elder brother and a younger brother. only my elder brother is married. These days I am in small pressure for getting mingle but finding a life partner is not easy. Also, in my company there are 60 days after completing two years. Going back to India is easy but getting a job and good money is not easy and here I can not survey with her.

Ans. This is a peculiar situation where you have a good job but are not married yet. You are looking for a life partner and that is proving difficult for you. Well one way could be to advertise in India for a partner and get into an ‘arranged marriage’. Instead of mingling and trying to mingle you could advertise and go through these matrimony sites. Of course you may not like to shift to India due to monetary reasons but you could come to India for marriage and take her with you to Middle East. No one stops you for opting for that except the COVID situation. A few months and the situation will ease out and you can marry. Meanwhile engage yourself with matrimony sites and bride hunting by talking to the prospective girls/women and get busy. I am sure many women would be willing to accompany you to the M.East. If the job is lucrative and if you are happy with it please do not leave it and come back to India. Many people have found their life partners through these sites. I wish you good luck!


Q. I love English language and love to write. I read your columns regularly and also of other people I follow. I have written small pieces for the newspaper and also for Twinkle when I was in school. I think I would like to be a writer but I have taken science as I like it too and everyone put pressure. Now I don’t know what to choose? My heart lies in writing and my reasoning says science is a good profession. Please help me make a choice.

Ans. Well, it is good to know that you like science and it comes easily to you and you love writing as well. As I think you could retain both for the moment and continue to study science till you get bored and continue to write as well. Many people make a switch mid-way or earlier after a few years of work experience when they feel grounded with some money in the pocket and lots of experience on the job. They are better equipped with the world scene and the market scenario to make a choice to shift full time into writing. No one can steal your writing ability but science will have to be studied and honed. Of course writing also needs honing with many years of practice but an interest and flair for language can feed it and nourish it without formal training too! Science would need formal training and education. This is one option since you said you like science as well. Second option is to get straight into English literature or then journalism and mass media. This shuts down the options of science completely. If you will not miss science and regret it later, go ahead and jump into writing and language head on. Be sure of yourself. If still confused take a session with me on career guidance and planning.


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