‘Right time to focus on self-development’ 23 October 2022

H. B.

Q. I am student studying in 3rd year of engineering now and I think of myself that I am right now on my turning point as next year there will be campus selection and everything will be changing. Here is quick overview how is my life I am expecting some guidance to improve it. I was not focused on studying but I have now understood my mistake and have started covering my syllabus and I am determined. Regarding by friends I have literally no friends. Once I was popular guy but now don’t have anyone, but I think I am not missing anyone or feel that I need one. Similarly, I just lost my 3 year long relationship but we both had no feelings for each other at the end so I didn’t grief much. I am confused little bit over my career as I am interested in learning everything now. And that I want to live my life passionately I also feel insecure if I will be able to live financially stable life as I want to become entrepreneur. Next about my mind-set I always talk to myself so I usually perceive things normally as there are two people in my mind. It’s been going since 10 years but I don’t feel any problem from this apart from that I overthink, procrastinate and feel lack of power to execute what I think of doing. I am also trying to deal with little bit of loneliness as I just broke up. Please guide me for better. Thank you

Ans. Thanks for your mail seeking guidance. I think you are on the right path of seriously focusing on career making now that you are getting into the last year of graduation when campus selections will start. Besides the technical knowledge that companies seek, they also look for good personality qualities. So, besides the fact that you should focus on your syllabus and study hard, you should also focus on grooming yourself. Presence of mind, general knowledge, good communication skills, friendly nature, courage of convictions and good presentation skills. This does not mean that you need to become a popular guy again, but it means that you should not appear as a loner who shuns people. You can maintain your distance but bear a smiling and pleasing personality which is attractive and not intimidating. Loneliness is not healthy and enjoying the company of friends is good. You may spend a short time with friends every day or alternate days or on week-ends. A well rounded personality has advantages. A positive mind-set, emotions in control, hard-working, focused on achievement, and affable, seems like a tall order, but can be a goal for the next years. It is also important to exercise, play a sport or game, eat well and sleep well. It’s a good idea to become an entrepreneur and if there are short term courses around your city, you could join them later when slightly free. An entrepreneur needs many good qualities to become successful besides having all the various skills of management. Depending upon your family background, you could plan your switch sooner or later after working in a job for some years. Gaining a few years of experience on a job brings confidence and practical clarity of your own strengths and weaknesses. Nobody teaches you as much as your experience on the field. First things first, focus on studies and developing a good personality.   

N.K

Q. Hello mam. What are your beliefs about hypnotherapy? Can you please suggest any online recognised course to become a certified hypnotherapist in India through which we can practice the same. Thank you.

Ans. I am not much aware of the present status and efficacy of the courses in hypnotherapy. I know hypnotherapy is based on the principle of ‘suggestion’ and taps the sub-conscious part of the mind. It may take many years to become an effective therapist. It helps in many ways and also has its limitations. It is best to be a graduate in psychology or medicine, although it is open to all. It would be difficult to say which are the best courses online, but I can help you by making enquires with friends. You can call me on 9823073986 and I will try and help.

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