Q. I am an 18 year old girl. I am good in academics and my social behaviour is also good. My parents and my younger sister say that I am the root cause of every argument. At that time I feel very bad. They sometimes also say that I am ‘abnormal’ but I am not. I’ve only helped them many times but they forget it. They don’t talk to me properly, I feel very sad. I only apologise every time even if it’s not my fault. I can’t come for counselling. They opine that I can only dream big but not achieve and I am good for nothing. My sister never respects me though she is five years younger than me. Please tell me how to deal with these problems.
Ans. This sounds very strange. When you feel that you are good in all ways in studies as well as social behaviour I wonder why your family behaves that way with you? What does your father say? If no member is on your side then you will have to re-evaluate your behaviour from a fresh perspective. There may be something you are missing in your self assessment. Ask your friends and other relatives you can trust if you are wrong in some way. You must know what behaviour of yours makes them feel that way. Try to talk to someone who understands your current situation and will also be able to be a connection with your family. However do not despair. Keep focused on your studies and achievement. Success changes many things. Have patience.
Q. I am 19 years old. From last few months I’m suffering from depression, anxiety, guilt some times. I get strong feelings of suicide. Ma’am, can you please take me out of this. I am ready for everything. I hope you take my matter seriously.
Ans. This is a very bad state of mind and needs immediate attention. We need to know the reasons and the causes of your depression. Has there been any past incident which makes you feel like that? Your parents are the best people who can understand your pain. Try talking to them about your mental condition. If you feel that’s not possible then share it with someone close to you or with someone whom you trust. Every problem has a solution and everything can be sorted. There are simple methods you can try at home. The first one is to think positive thoughts. The second is to exercise and work out your emotions. The third is to have friends and spend time with them. The next one is to have confidence in your-self. If nothing works you need to seek counselling immediately. Do not wait for more than a week.
Q. I am the mother of a 17 year old girl. She has completed her 12th. We are worried about her career. She is interested in dancing and wants to make her career in that field. She doesn’t want to do the course from Nagpur and we don’t want her to go out of Nagpur as she has never lived alone and is very dependent on me. It’s difficult to understand her behaviour. She wants everything to be done her way or else she becomes hyper and aggressive. Please guide us what to do?
Ans. We need to trust our children and their career choice and help them to achieve their goals in life. If your daughter is serious about her career decision, she will learn to adjust to the new atmosphere. As parents you need to make sure that the college and the place is safe for your child. If you are not convinced of her choice at all you could bring her for career guidance and counselling.
Q.I am a 26 year old girl. I am a simple girl and want to lead a simple life. I want to get settled with the right person but every time I end up with the wrong guy. I sincerely try hard to maintain my relationship but I don’t know what goes wrong and I end up being alone. I feel lonely and unwanted. Please tell me what to do?
Ans. This is really unfortunate that this has happened to you and that you have been unlucky in love. This can happen to many people where they are unable to find the right choice .You could take a break and concentrate on your job and don’t get entangled in any relationship for now. Another alternative would be to trust your parent’s wisdom and entrust them with the responsibility to find the right partner for you. Being a simple person you may not be making a proper judgement of the person. I am sure you’ll find ultimately a good human being and you will lead a happy life.